Hi Friends, Today’s topic for discussion is Relationships of Long Distance. It is one of the hardest relationships to carry forward in life as it has many issues to be addressed. We will try to understand why it is difficult to maintain such a relationship. We will also try to give a solution by mentioning those things that should be done by both the partners and most importantly what are the things to be avoided. So let’s start and try to understand how to survive a such relationship.
Table Of Contents
Long Distance Relationship: A Definition
Before jumping into the discussion, let’s define which relationship will fall into the category of a long-distance relationship. The definition of a Long Distance Relationship would be, any relationship, where a couple has to stay apart in a different city, for some reason, would fall into this category. The reason could be a job, a kid’s education, some family issues or maybe both are taking time from each other.
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Long Distance Relationship: A Testing Relationship
Why long-distance relations are the most difficult ones to maintain, why do many people see long-distance relationships as the beginning of the end of the relationship? We will try to address the issues with long-distance relationships in the coming part of this post, try to give reasons for the failure of long-distance relationships and also try to give some time-tested ways and means, do’s and don’ts for long-distance relationships.
Reason for Failure of Such Relationship
Trust me on this, my friends, in more than half of the cases, long Distance Relations ended as a failure or at least went through such a rough phase that one wrong push, and you will end up on the other side of it. The following is the reason for the failure of these relationships-
- Lack of Trust: This is the biggest reason for the failure of any relationship in the case of Long Distance Relations since distance kept you apart. Your partner may cheat you or not, but your not trusting him (or her) will definitely make him move away from you.
- Cheating: Yes my friends, cheating happens a lot in a long-distance relationship. And one of the biggest reasons for the failure of such relations as well as any relationship.
- Lack of Bonding: If you and your partner don’t go along enough and are in the relationship for the sake of it, then try what may, your relationship will end soon. It has happened in the past, still happening and will always happen in future also.
- Emotional Support: Since distances keep you apart, the better chance is that you and your partner will be without the emotional support of each other, so wherever emotional support is available, human moves like a magnet and metal. Getting emotional support from anywhere other than your partner is one of the biggest reasons for the failure of a long-distance relationship
- Physical Needs: Sometimes people confused cheating with a fulfilling physical need. I believe, there is a thin red line between cheating and fulfilling physical needs. Cheating can be done even if your partner stays with you, whereas the latter generally arises when you are not getting it because you are not getting it from your partner. The reason can be medical or in our case distance.
- Not Getting Attention: Sometimes when you are in a long-distance relationship and you are getting more attention from someone other than your partner, there is a good chance that you will move to the place where you are getting more of it.
- Fight: Constantly fighting between you two will create a place for entering a new one. You or your partner may feel calm with that person whereas with each other you are scared to being fight again. This is one of the biggest reasons for the fall of the long-distance relationship apart.
- Not Giving Enough Space: This is true not only for long-distance relationships but for all relationships. Not respecting the personal space of other people can lead to the end of a long-distance relationship.
- Getting a Better Option: This is the harsh truth of life, a long-distance relationship can be ended because of a better option. Life is about choices, life moves around the choices that we made. Sometimes even if everything is fine, one of you gets a better option, and you just go with the flow.
- No End Date: These relationships are bound to be finished if you don’t put an end date to it. I mean if you have decided that we will start living together. Long-distance Relations with no end date would end themselves.
- Disturbing Your Partner Each & Every Time: As mentioned above, this disturbance may be out of habit, insecurity, or suspicion, but disturbing your partner too much will end up with him or her being upset with you. As they say, too much of anything is bad.
Things Should Be Done to Make a Long Distance Relationship Working
Now that we have listed out the main reasons for long-distance relationships to foul, let’s move ahead with the solution of it. Let’s go through those practices which if you two will put into your practice, your long-distance relationship will have a good chance of survival for a longer time.
- Trust Your Partner: This is the best thing that you can do to make your long-distance relationship last. This may sound tough for many and they can’t trust their partner blindly, but trust me, my friends, there is nothing that you can do better. However, Just remind them every now and then that you trust him or her. And for this reason, you are not invading their personal space, but you can if you want and you have chosen not to do that because you trust him or her. This will create a sense of responsibility in your partner and there is a very good chance that he or may feel guilty every time a thought of cheating would come to their mind.
- Stop Cheating: If you want your long-distance relationship to last more. And if you are planning to spend a good life with your partner, after this distance end, then stop cheating if you are doing. Cheating in any relationship, especially in long-distance relationships is like sitting on a time bomb. It is going to explode soon. You may enjoy it now, but if you are really interested and commit yourself that you are going to spend the rest of your life with your partner, then you need to retrospect yourself if you are cheating and have to decide If this is worth an upcoming great life that you have planned with your partner.
- Make Your Bond Stronger: Try to make the bond among you stronger. This can be done by many things which will discuss later on in the post.
- Provide Even More Emotional Support: Take care of the things that your partner would love. Order his favourite food once in a while, send his favourite colour dress, and whenever he or she is down, try to talk him (or her) out of that situation by talking about his favourite sports or movies or something similar. In a nutshell, you have to provide him with more mental and emotional support.
- Physical Needs: Though love is eternal, Physical needs also play it part in a big way. Even if you guys stay apart, try meeting with your partner every now and then so that you both can fulfil each other emotional as well as physical needs.
- Give Enough Space to Your Partner: Give enough space to your partner. This is one of the key elements for a successful these relationships. For example, if he or she is planning to have a hangout with an office colleague, don’t call him again and again. Because if you call him again and again, next time there is a very good chance that your partner will hide things from you. This means you are training your partner to chat with you or at least preparing him to become a liar to you.
- Stop Fighting: If you guys are in a quarrel or have a different opinion about something, try to calm yourself. Don’t indulge yourself and him in a fight over something by bringing that thing up again and again. Because if you can’t stop yourself from doing this, you are opening a door for the entry of another person.
- Give Your Partner Enough Attention: sometimes your partner will move out of your long-distance affair just because you are not attentive towards him or her. If you are not giving him enough attention, the other person is going to give him enough attention and will be listing to his or her advice. Remember relationships are the scarcest things in today’s scenario. If you are not giving him attention for a reason, abolish that my friends. It will definitely not going to be necessary.
- Getting a Better Option? What Should be Done: This is a dilemma. Yes, there is a very good chance that you being in a long-distance relationship, still get a better option, even though you are not looking. But the other person is looking and somehow you are his or her choice. What should, you do in such cases It s a callous question to ask. But you have to do should searching, if this new person whom you meet for one week or something, is worth the year of effort, emotions, and happiness that you have seen in your current long-distance relationship. And what will happen if you will leave him alone like this? Life is all about karma, you will get it back here only. If you leave your year-old relationship for a better person, then someday someone will also leave you for a better option. If you keep your head straight and have these thoughts well placed in your head, I don’t think any option be it better or best can move you from your current long distance relationship. Or any other relationship.
- Put An END Date: This is probably the most important but sadly most overlooked aspect. Please put an end date to your staying away. And try to work towards moving together. This should be your ultimate target and one should work towards achieving this at all costs.
Other Important Things to Be Done to Save a Long Distance Relation
Now that we have seen are major reasons for a long-distance relationship to fall apart and what are the things that one should do to avoid those things? But one thing is missing, the spark. This is a truth for every relationship; you have to do things that keep the spark of your distant relationship alive. We have jotted down the following things that you should bring into daily practice.
- Praise Her Beauty: praise her beauty whenever you get any chance to do that. For ladies, the same thing applies, praise how good looks he and how dashing he looks whenever he wears this colour dress or that colour dress. Praise should be part of every relationship not only these relationships. Everyone likes to be praised, so bring this art of parsing into your relationship.
- Send Naughty Messages: As we said earlier, try to maintain the spark between you two alive. Naughty chats would be a good means to do that. This could be about the experience that you have done in past or about some quotes. Remember Double meaning jokes don’t fall in this category.
- Go on Unexpected Trips: This could be mountain tracking together that you have not done before and a cycling journey that none of you have imagined that you can do it together. These are the memories that will be with you forever and will make the bond between you two stronger. So strong that it will last for the distant relationship testing times.
- Intimate on Video or Audio Calls Often: Though love is beyond and above everything, intimacy is the direct product of it. Your love will be enhanced by it. Since distance keeps you guys apart, video and audio will come as an aid for you.
- Tell Your Partner About Your New Friend, Colleagues: we have mentioned it earlier; trust is the major issue with long distance relationship. If you tell your partner about your friends and colleagues, new people that you have interacted with recently; you have taken care of half of that thing. Because your partner is aware of the people you are interacting with, he or she would not react to it otherwise imagine if this would come as a surprise to him or her.
- Know About Each Other Schedule: You should know about the schedule of your partner. This would help you both avoid being in awkward situations. Imagine she is in a meeting and you are dying to tell her that you love her so much; this would only create negativity nothing more. If he is having a beer with his friends, I am sure you don’t want to bother him with you having a fight with your younger sister.
- Use Your Alone Time: Try to be constructive, use this alone time to learn new things, a language, a hobby may be an art or something along similar lines. Try to in touch with your friends and family. Make new friends. Read something that will help you in your life in the long run. Don’t feel miserable that you are alone rather learn constructive things and you will pass this alone time being a winner.
We firmly believe that if you follow all or some of the basics for Long Distance Relationship, you are going to sail this time and will be together for a great life ahead. Feel free to ask any questions in the comment box.
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